Academic Writing Support

Academic writing is difficult.

Your teachers want 'something' but what?

I struggled so I hope this course helps - but there will be a lot of reading - take your time.

This approach will seem a bit silly at first but bear with me, maybe something will click. I will make it possible for you to submit what you do along the way if you want to. It will be in a pop up window - keep it open so you can keep coming back to it. I promise to try and give you some feedback for you to ignore

Exercise One

Are you ready for this, this is going to be really hard....

Please stand up, look out the window - what do you see? Please notice three (3) things - any three things. Write something like the below.

Done? Not so hard right?

Exercise Two

Right, take that sentence you just wrote and add some opinions and 'facts' about what you can see. [Click here to write]

Done? Simple?

The first thing we have to notice - The Form

The topic sentence should tell the reader what they are about to read about, nothing more.

As teachers, we   see this all the time - don't include other stuff.

Here is an example

Huh? Where did the flowers come from? Why are you talking about flowers? No one likes flowers, especially when they suddenly appear for no reason. These flowers are weeds - kill them. Kill them quickly because they will only lead to confusion.

Got it?

Hint - write the paragraph body - the supporting sentences - first and the topic sentence second. It is just easier. And when you proofread your assignment, make sure that everything in the body relates to the topic sentence. If it does not - then change it.

Fact or Opinion?

Ok - the next thing you need to notice - the information that was added - were those things facts or opinions?

The Information	Opinion?	Why is it an opinion?
beautiful	Yes	What you think is beautiful and what I think is beautiful are two completely different things
green	Yes	People even disagree on colours
Porsche	Yes	No, can't be, it is one of the older Lexus's - look at how ugly it is ;)
silver and black	Yes	No, it is two different shades of grey
Harley Davidson	Yes	Nope, it is a customized Honda
owned	Yes	Maybe, but I think that 'Owned by the bank' is a better way of looking at it
the coolest person at the polytechnic	Yes	LOL!
white	Yes	Nah, hasn't been washed in a while, off white maybe
polo shirt	Yes	Polo is a brand, I do not think that the polytechnic is going to buy Ralph Lauren shirts for the security staff
he is not cool	Yes	You tell him that

Even that he is a security guard is up for debate. Not because of the definition of the job, but each person's understanding of what a security guard is, is different. This is especially true when you are talking internationally. But this is too deep for right now. Let's keep it simple.

So, the point here is, there are actually very few facts. Things like the Earth is round (??), and water freezes at zero degrees are facts, but most of the things we write about in academic writing are not facts. You should never assume that something is a fact because there will be someone who will argue with you. Do you want to argue with people?

But we can make what we write stronger (or 'less-argue-with-able'). Look at Exercise three.

Exercise Three

Get your friend to stand up and look out the window. Ask them about the three things you wrote down. Add their comments like the paragraph below. Here is the link to the place you are writing one more time.

I have added the opinion of another to support what I have written. I removed the white Polo shirt comment because, well, I don't know how to include it - You can do the same in your essays, if it doesn't fit and it isn't needed, remove it - that is what proofreading is all about.

This person, Lawrence, just happened to be there and is actually colour-blind and knows nothing about cars or bikes. But if the person you were talking to was an expert on cars, bikes and security guards; then, what they say, which agrees with what you are saying, will make what your paragraph far less 'less-argue-with-able.'

This is why we include quotes and citations in our work - check out the APA stuff now if you want.

However, I then went and did something stupid - I asked the security guard if he was cool....

Ok - so what have we done?

• There are no 'facts' in academic writing
• Do not include extra information in the body of your paragraph that is not covered in the topic sentence
  
• Write the topic sentence after writing the paragraph
• You can make your writing 'less-argue-with-able' if you include the opinions of others, especially if they are experts.

Not all of your assignments will be like this but this is a useful approach to keep in mind as you write.

And just a quick FYI - Blog writers are not (usually) experts. Academic people who have published journal articles and books are better 'experts' because other people who are also experts read their work and agree (or not). The more people who agree on something, the 'less-argue-with-able' your information is.

Right. Take a break. You have done well. When you are ready - click 'Next'.

According to Barnard and Scampton (2006) "students [...] might be expected to understand and use a range of modal expressions – particularly those preparing to undertake academic study in tertiary institutions."

Yes, I am quoting myself

Yet, the discussion around modality and hedging is a very important part of academic writing and one that often does not get enough attention in your classes.

Hang on - Moda what? Hedga what?

For the sake of simplicity, lets call Modality and Hedging the same thing.

We have all studied 'Modal verbs' in class right? But what is the point? Basically Hedging and Modality soften what we say. Look at this example.

Now - What do we use to accomplish this?

Modal Auxillary Verbs - these are the ones everyone talks about. Depending on who you read, Palmer (1986) suggests that there are nine whilst Leech (2001) identifies 11 and Kennedy (2003) includes 13. Good luck - I am assuming that you know them already?

Lexical modality - this form of modality is harder to define. Thoughtco [Link] says that it is "...the expression of modal meanings through nouns, adjectives, verbs, or adverbs used in a modal context."

So now that that is clear.... Can we say why it is important? No?

OK - so the Hong Kong Polytechnic (2012) writes that

When you discuss ideas or data in your written assignments, you should use cautious rather than assertive language. This means that you should avoid expressions such as: clearly obviously without a doubt certainly undoubtedly definitely there is no doubt that it is a fact that You should also take care when using words like always, never, every and all. The reason for this is that academic writing usually reports on research, and in your research area there may be information that you have not found, exceptions to the rules that you find, and the situation may change over time. Therefore you need to use cautious language to avoid the possibility of people saying that you are wrong. BE CAREFUL: in the academic world teachers are looking for their students' mistakes, and researchers are looking for each other's mistakes. Criticizing mistakes and correcting them is part of scientific method, and is therefore common, and is regarded by researchers as a good thing to do.

So, can you see how the addition of modality and hedging makes your opinion 'less-argue-with-able.' In your academic writing, you do not have all the answers (yet) and that is OK. But showing your tutors you have read and included expert opinions makes them think that you are making an informed suggestion, based on the reading and research that you have done. This is where the points are!

OK - Examples

Modal Auxiliary Verbs

Lexical modality

The list is pretty endless TBH. Even conditionals are a form of modality if you think about it.

Ok, lets try some real examples adapted from student work from a Business course.

Your turn

Grab one of your assignments - copy and paste 10 sentences and modalise them here - it is the same place as the previous page so don't worry about your paragraph. Add information on how you modalised the sentence the same as above (Lexical or Auxiliary verb modality). Don't forget to add references too ["jkbdfvjbhfjanhbdfvjahdbhdf" (Scampton, 2019)] if you can. Check out 'Some other little tips' below too.

What have we learnt?

• Modality and hedging soften what you are saying and make it 'less-argue-with-able'
• Modality can be lexical and/or auxiliary verbs
• Avoid redundancy and blanket statements

Some other little tips

Was just thinking about the redundancy comment above and it reminded me of when my tutor told me I was being redundant - really hurt my feelings. Here are some things that I have learnt from hard experience. I will not keep saying this stuff, but try to keep it in mind as you do your assignments?

• Only include one main idea per sentence
• Keep sentences short - 25 words max (ish)
• Do not repeat yourself
• Use non-redundant academic language like:
  • 'Because' and not 'Due to the fact that'
  • 'Used' and not 'Employed the use of'
  • 'Fundamentals' and not 'Basic fundamentals'
  • 'Eliminate' and not 'Completely eliminate'
  • 'Alternatives' and not 'Alternative choices'
  • 'Concisely' and not 'In as few words as possible'
• Nominalise if you can
• And get ya spelling roight....

Ok - quick recap

1. There are no facts (kinda) in academic writing.
2. What we say in our assignments is made stronger with references - especially from experts.
3. Modality and Hedging make your writing less-argue-with-able.
4. And write the topic sentence last.

Is that about right?

Theme and Rheme

Think of this as a rough rule of thumb. It is tricky in reality but a really good idea to keep in the back of your mind - especially when you are proofreading.

Look at this example.

[Me] 'I like swimming.'

[My friend] 'Manama is the capital of Bahrain.'

Conclusion - my friend is weird.

So, lets look at the paragraph again (Sorry, the video is pretty bad )

Activity

Here is your task - The five (5) sentences below are written to follow the sentence above. Is the Theme of each of the sentences related to the Theme or the Rheme?

1. External factors include natural disasters or strikes and cost increases caused by human influences.

   Theme Rheme

2. This unpredictability makes planning difficult at best, and can hamper efforts when allowed to have too controlling an influence in decision-making.

   Theme Rheme

3. Superficial factors, both internal and external, may be easily overcome but serious exoteric influences can seriously hamper organizational growth.

   Theme Rheme

4. Superficial factors, both internal and external, may be easily overcome but more serious exoteric influences can detrimentally effect organizational growth.

   Theme Rheme

5. This unpredictability makes planning difficult at best, and can hamper decision-making efforts.

   Theme Rheme

If you want to, grab one of your assignments and do this analysis with one paragraph and submit it. As I said, this idea can be confusing but it worth keeping in the back of your head as you write. 

Example -

Outside the window there is a car, a bike and a security guard. According to Lawrence (2017) the car [Theme 2 relates to Rheme 1] is a beautiful blue-green Porsche. The bike [Theme 3 relates to Rheme 1] is a silver and black Harley Davidson owned by the coolest person at the polytechnic (Lawrence, 2017). Lawrence also commented that the Bahrain Polytechnic security guard [Theme 4 relates to Rheme 1] is not cool (2017), although AlSedeqqi (2017) disagrees and suggested that coolness is defined by a white Bahrain Polytechnic Polo shirt.

Some other Academic Writing hints - completely unrelated

• Do not use contractions. 'Isn't' = No / Is not = Yes
• Do not use the first person [No 'I'].
• Do not use 'He' or 'She' - use 'They'.
• Do not assume knowledge - "Everybody knows..." & "It is common knowledge that...".
• No pretty pictures or nice colours. Academic writing is black and white. Impress your teacher with what you write only.
• Submit your assignment in the font required - but if you are not told, maybe submit a serif font if your tutor prints everything, and sans serif if they mark online [Serif vs. sans serif].

Ok - quick recap

1. There are no facts (kinda) in academic writing.
2. What we say in our assignments is made stronger with references - especially from experts.
3. Modality and Hedging make your writing less-argue-with-able.
4. Our writing should be connected to create some cohesion.
5. And write the topic sentence last.

Is that about right?

Ok - ready to start writing paragraphs then?

Before you venture too far - cast your eyes over the information below

It is the easiest paragraph to understand, but arguably the hardest one to write. The essay writer needs to persuade the reader to follow their ideas - which have been gained from research and uses evidence to balance arguments.

Some arguments used in persuasive arguments include:

1. Reason - Result
2. Means - Purpose
3. Means - Result
4. Grounds - Conclusion

Cause and Effect

The following four pages are sub-categories of 'Cause and Effect' - I was driving too fast (cause) and missed the turn off (effect).

• Reason - Result
• Means - Purpose
• Means - Result
  
• Grounds - Conclusion

These relationships are often reported to be missing or to be exaggerated.

Reason and Result

The most basic way of explaining this is 'Because' - sorry, not much help is it. Lets look at some examples.

I crashed into the other car because the driver did not indicate that they were changing lanes

	Reason	Result
- I learnt a lot from my studies at Bahrain Polytechnic because my tutors were so cool.	The tutors were so cool	I learnt a lot
- External factors can have an unexpected and detrimental effect on organisational growth because they are often unpredictable and may not be able to be planned for. [Check out that modality ]	Unpredictability of external factors	negative impacts that cannot be planned for
- An incomplete infrastructure may have a negative impact on the growth of the organisation in both short and long terms (No 'because' - you don't always need it)	incomplete infrastructure	negative impact on the growth
- The purchase of software and hardware was held up due to delays experienced in-house. ('Due to' functions like because)	Problems in purchasing department	purchase delayed
- Good profits were recorded in 2010 due in part to good planning, and the foresight of the General Manager.	Good planing and good foresight	Good profits

Often it uses past simple (but not necessarily) as usually the reason result relationship is not made or understood until after the event.

Any problems with the above examples? Yup, there are no references. Here are some of the sentences again with citations added.

- Porter (1979) suggests that external factors can have an unexpected and detrimental effect on organisational growth because they are often unpredictable and may not be able to be planned for.

- As stated in Mauboussin (2014), "[a]n incomplete infrastructure may have a negative impact on the growth of the organisation in both short and long terms."

- The purchase of software and hardware was held up due to delays experienced in-house. (Ritch, 2016)

- Good profits were recorded in 2010 due in part to good planning (Gates, 1999), and the foresight of the General Manager (Jobs, 1999).

Logic Leaps

I am going to add a warning here also. Many students assume knowledge and this is very dangerous in academic writing. Look at this example.

Why is that a reason for arriving late? Because the student is driven to school by their mother....

The student has expected the reader/teacher to fill in the gap - they have made a logic leap and expected the reader to jump with them. Do not do this in Academic writing. Have someone else read your assignment, they will soon tell you.

Your Turn

Go to one of your assignments. Try to find five good reason and result sentences. Add them here, but write each of them twice. Look at the example below. Is there a difference in the meaning at all?

• Good profits were recorded in 2010 due in part to good planning (Gates, 1999), and the foresight of the General Manager (Jobs, 1999) for Apple.
• Good planning (Gates, 1999), and the foresight of the General Manager (Jobs, 1999) resulted in the high profits for 2010 for Apple.

Please also note the four reason and result words used on this page - 'Because' is the first one (only three more )

Some other little tips

Here are some things that I have learnt from hard experience. I will not keep saying this stuff (I lied ), but try to keep it in mind as you do your assignments?

• Only include one main idea per sentence.
• Keep sentences short - 25 words max (ish).
• Do not repeat yourself.
• Use non-redundant academic language like:
  • 'Because' and not 'Due to the fact that' (I would fail you just for using this phrase)
    
  • 'Used' and not 'Employed the use of'
  • 'Fundamentals' and not 'Basic fundamentals'
  • 'Eliminate' and not 'Completely eliminate'
  • 'Alternatives' and not 'Alternative choices'
  • 'Concisely' and not 'In as few words as possible'
• Read your work out loud.
• Proof read at least seven times - that is one more than six, two more than five, seven less than 14.
• Write numbers in full until ten and then write the number (see sentence above )
• Do not use the first person - Never use 'I' unless it is a reflection.
• Do not use sexist language - always use 'They'.

Cause and Effect

This is the second sub-category of 'Cause and Effect' - I was driving too fast (cause) and missed the turn off (effect).

• Reason - Result
• Means - Purpose
  
• Means - Result
• Grounds - Conclusion

These relationships are often reported to be missing or to be exaggerated.

Means and Purpose

The most basic way of explaining this is 'How + to' - sorry, not much help is it. Lets look at some examples.

Shawn quit his job to move on to bigger and better things. Well, maybe.

The manner in which you claim that something is done for a particular reason will be very useful - but remember that the purpose will most often require a citation because you are not a mind reader. This relationship often uses present simple (for things that are usually true - see example 2) and past simple (to explain why one event happened - see example 3).

Any problems with the above examples? Yup, no references and the two present simple examples have not been modalised. Check out the comparison below.

Your Turn

Go to one of your assignments. Try to find five 'bad' means purpose sentences. Add them here, but write each of them twice. Look at the example below. Is there a difference in the meaning at all?

• Organisations should have clearly stated long term goals and action plans as they ensure that everyday decisions are made in accordance with those plans and goals. (Pencarrow, 1988)
• Pencarrow (1988) suggests that in order to ensure that everyday decisions are made in accordance with those plans and goals, organisations should have clearly stated long term goals and action plans.

Please also add modality to them, and think about the words that were used to add the two parts of the sentence together? What were they and can you add more?

Some other little tips

Here are some things that I have learnt from hard experience. I will not keep saying this stuff (I lied again), but try to keep it in mind as you do your assignments?

• Only include one main idea per sentence.
• Keep sentences short - 25 words max (ish).
• Do not repeat yourself.
• Use non-redundant academic language.
  
• Read your work out loud.
• Proof read at least seven times - that is one more than six, two more than five, seven less than 14.
• Write numbers in full until ten and then write the number (see sentence above )
• Avoid using colloquialisms such as 'sort of' or 'basically'. Use 'somewhat' or 'fundamentally'
• Write words out in full - '...is not...,' not 'isn't'
• No cliches - '...at the critical moment....' not 'in the nick of time'

Cause and Effect

This is the third sub-category of 'Cause and Effect' - I was driving too fast (cause) and missed the turn off (effect).

• Reason - Result
• Means - Purpose
  
• Means - Result
• Grounds - Conclusion

These relationships are often reported to be missing or to be exaggerated.

Means and Result

The most basic way of explaining this is 'How + outcome' - sorry, not much help is it. Lets look at some examples.

The means result relationship may be an appropriate choice for all students - it is the manner in which you claim that something was done to account for a particular outcome. The grammatical is very often uses 'by' or 'to'. This relationship often most uses past simple (to explain why one event happened).

Always remember that when you write your assignment, your voice is made stronger by including the voice of other expert others - so yes, you must include citations.

Sidebar

Hey - did you know what PDF meant above? Do you know what an acronym is?

PDF is an acronym and, in academic writing, you must always define them first time they are used, even if it is something that you use every day - like PDF. Even if you know that your tutor knows what it means, always define them first.

What are these? Look them up if you need to.

• URL
• UN
• TBH
• LOL
• RSVP

Any problems with the above examples? No? Ok, please read the below. Let's leave referencing out right now.

So in an attempt to be clear...

Means Purpose - something is done for a reason

Means Result - something is done and something happens - either intended or not

Your Turn

Go to one of your assignments. Try to find five Means Purpose or Means Result sentences. Add them here, but write each of them twice. Once in the present simple tense and once in the past simple tense. Then explain in your own words what the difference is. Include your citations and modality as appropriate.

When you have done that - look at the example below. Is there a difference in the meaning at all?

• Organisations should have clearly stated long term goals and action plans as they ensure that everyday decisions are made in accordance with those plans and goals (Pencarrow, 1988).
• Pencarrow (1988) suggests that in order to ensure that everyday decisions are made in accordance with those plans and goals, organisations should have clearly stated long term goals and action plans.

Do you think that there is a difference in the meaning here?

This is something called 'Sentence loading'. Simply put, the first part of the sentence is what you are talking about. So if your paragraph is about "...long term goals and action plans ..." - use the first sentence. If your paragraph is about aligning everyday decisions - then use the second sentence. Capisce?

Change the sentence loading of your five sentences you submitted above. Do they still work? What do you think?

Some other little tips

Here are some things that I have learnt from hard experience. I will not keep saying this stuff (I lied ), but try to keep it in mind as you do your assignments?

• Only include one main idea per sentence.
• Keep sentences short - 25 words max (ish).
• Do not repeat yourself.
• Use non-redundant academic language.
  
• Read your work out loud.
• Proof read at least seven times - that is one more than six, two more than five, seven less than 14.
• Write numbers in full until ten and then write the number (see sentence above )
• Avoid using colloquialisms such as 'sort of' or 'basically'. Use 'somewhat' or 'fundamentally'
• Write words out in full - '...is not...,' not 'isn't'
• No cliches - '...at the critical moment....' not 'in the nick of time'
• Do not use sexist language - refer to all people (singular or plural) as 'they' or 'them'
• Data is plural, datum is singular. But it is an uncountable noun... 'The data are...' is always correct. Good luck talk to your tutor.
• Passive vs Active - The passive voice is often used in academic writing as it is seen as more impersonal and therefore more objective. I agree. Your tutor may not - check with them.

Cause and Effect

The fourth sub-category of 'Cause and Effect' - I was driving too fast (cause) and missed the turn off (effect).

• Reason - Result
• Means - Purpose
  
• Means - Result
• Grounds - Conclusion

These relationships are often reported to be missing or to be exaggerated.

Grounds Conclusion

The most basic way of explaining this is 'What + understanding' - sorry, not much help is it. Lets look at some examples.

	Grounds	Conclusion
- The student was wearing a Rolex, so they must be rich.	Rolex	Student is rich... or a thief
- Sims (2007) stated that businesses with well written mission statements and long term goals generally outperform those with no clear direction. The organisation that was analysed as a part of this project had no such clear statements or goals and so may not do well in the future.	Evidence from author	The organisation will not do well
- Managers and Chief Executive Officers (CEO) should have a lot of experience in both their industry and in managing people (Pencarrow, 2009). The CEO of the business under consideration has 17 years of experience and has worked in every facet of the organization.	Evidence from author	The organisation should do well
- Analysis was done of the external factors that have historically affected the organisation. It was discovered that they are cyclical and could possibly create the same set of disturbances in the future.	Evidence from research	The organisation might not do well
- Archival research of the impact of the strategic planning for the 2014 and 2015 periods was undertaken. The evidence suggested that previous strategic decisions have had minimal impact on the organisation.	Evidence from research	The organisation might not do well

The Grounds Conclusion relationship may not be an appropriate choice for all students. Remember that in academic writing, almost all of what you say is an opinion backed up with the evidence supplied by expert others. The expert others have published their work and this most often means that others who are also experts have read it and agreed. That is why including the information from journals and text books is so much more acceptable than websites which could have been created by anyone.

As this relationship involves you making a claim (the conclusion), this relationship should be used carefully.